Be Patient Young Jedi, here are three Lessons on Patience

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I am not a patient person. My nature is to mow to the end, with little thought of consequence. Always been more important to me to finish, not finish finely. It is my biggest personality flaw. Patiently I wait for patience.

#1 Patience While Learning A Language

I cannot convey every thought that goes racing through my mind at mach speed, at the exact moment I think them. Very frustrating when learning a new language. In Canada, we meet many people learning English, who were moving from all over the world. S comes to mind, a beautiful lady from Korea, her and her daughter are on the outer circle of our circle of friends. When we met her she said very little. Now she jokes and keeps up with the gang. It is amazing to see others like ourselves, taking huge leaps of faith while searching for more options for their children, in an ever changing world. Looking through the other side of the glass while learning a new language, I now have a better understanding at her struggles, and wish I showed more patience then.

#2 Patience While Looking For A House In France

It will happen; it just isn’t fast enough for the impatient Hamori family. It will all come together when time is right. Closing on a house from day of signing to getting the keys usually takes 3-6 months. We push for a 60-day close. That is very fast by French standards.

#3 Patience With The Kids

This has always been hard for me, as many of my lovely friends have witnessed.  With the children trying to adjust to a new country, a new language and a new temporary home, I need patience to give them the time and space they need and doing so seems harder still. Although I am getting better, with so much information being thrown at us, I could always use more. Did I ever have patience and lost it? Nope, I never had it! It is high time I learned. Patience is a virtue, and I teach my kids the tools to calm down, and take a minute when they get frustrated and logically work through their issues. I should take my own advice, and learn this lesson from my own children.

We have seen many houses in France, some perfect but out of our price range, others, too small, below budget. The question was; do we look for a home with a business potential, either a garage to convert in the village or do we find a home outside the centre of town that has more amenities that a family could enjoy and have a business completely separate? 

A good question! Some places offer bare living arrangements, but great business potential and others offer no business space at all, but beautiful living space. Our idea of what we needed to live in France has changed, and with the markets and economy of Europe changing along side, makes for a harder decision when buying. The banks stopped lending money, forcing us to tighten up our budget and start our house hunt a fresh. This last search did turn up the perfect Hamori home.

You will have to watch House Hunters International to see what it looks like! We film January in Budapest and February in our new home. I can only hope that more and more people come to the south of France to see first hand at how truly beautiful it is here.

With the world economy going in the direction it is, there are so many great deals to be had. A property we could not afford 1 year ago, is now within reach. Some properties are as much as 30% lower than when we started looking in January online. That is the list price not selling price. The French like to post inflated prices, and wait for a buyer, taking years to sell. Very different to our Canadian multiple listing service. Here there is no way to compare per square footage, or a system to accurately measure value. It goes on what a person is willing to pay.

I was thinking about it today, we started on this plan 2 weeks into January 2011, and we will be in our new home, roughly the same time. Exactly one year of goal making, researching, selling, packing, travelling and planning some more, to get to where we are. Not a bad time frame to execute a plan! 

But the story doesn’t end here. Like most people who move to a new country, we have a language to learn, a business to start up, customs and traditions to learn, and above all family adventure journaling while exploring the area.

We have the mountains to ski, the ocean to swim in, trails to follow, and hundreds the castles to explore. This week we see a winery first hand, and learn the ins and outs with our friend F. The Christmas markets start up this week, and today we go to Carcassonne to see a medieval show with our lovely friends C and P and their boy L.

Whenever I speak to a French resident living here, they always ask, why France? Well, I like the French! Southern France has such warm hearted people who surround our family. The French love children, as the Italian’s are known for. They touch Daniel’s curly hair at the market, and comment on how little Angelina is for her age. They ask what they are like as people, and are truly interested in them. If you have children, you are part of the community, end of story. More and more moms hunt us out and make sure we are okay if they see us standing to one side. We get waves no matter where we go in town, and the people are always eager to help us with questions.

Back to patience

I listen. New for me! Slow down my thoughts, and just absorb. I cannot jump to the end, I cannot rush the education of the experience, there is only one way to finish, and that is slowly day-by-day, inching my way until I can speak the language.

Once in the house, we will look back and think how fast the whole process took, and will never believe we complained about the slow speed of things. This day will come, rest assured.

And lastly, being a mother is a learning experience. Patience is something I obviously will struggle with for the rest of my life.

I must hold steadfast in the face of opposition.

I must remain calm without complaint.

I must manifest forbearance under strain.

My new mantras. I practice self control. I must take baby steps towards mastering my own character.

Often I laugh at myself, meeting someone for the first time, and I pull out my translator and start tapping away. I can see if they want to play or not fairly quickly. Usually they try, and are all smiles. Thank you for your patience with me Capestang

That’s Hamori


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